What is Haya?
Haya itself is derived from the word hayat which means life. This term covers a wide number of concepts. In English, it may be translated as modesty, shyness, self-respect, bashfulness, shame, honour, humility, etc. It's like an ornament of which beatifies a girl, a piece of jewel that no money can buy, no shop can stock and no tailor can stitch, it's taught, passed down, learned and practised, it's an art form which is mastered through Islam, of one of the basic needs which a woman should possess, to be a modest Muslimah:
Narrated by Abu Huraira (ra): The Prophet said, "Faith (Belief) consists of more than sixty branches (i.e. parts). And Haya is a part of faith." (Bukhari)
Modesty is part of our character, a part of our faith, something we should be proud to have attained:
Narrated Abdullah ibn Umar (ra): The Prophet (saws) passed by a man who was admonishing his brother regarding Haya and was saying, "You are very shy, and I am afraid that might harm you." On that, Allah's Apostle said, "Leave him, for Haya is (a part) of Faith." (Bukhari)
Now the above hadith is also a form of proof that "shyness" is not just something regarding women but also an attribute that believing men should have, for it is an indication if their fear of Allah and an indication of the value of their Deen, but my thread is emphasising on the girls, the women of today.
There are two forms of Haya, inner and outer:
Haya and Iman are interdependent; therefore either they both exist together or they both perish. Thus, the Prophet (saws) has said in one hadith, "When there is no haya left, then do as you please."
Abdullah ibn Umar (ra) narrated that the Prophet (saw) said: "Indeed haya (modesty) and Iman are Companions. When one of them is lifted, the other leaves as well." (Baihaqi)
Today vulgarity and all its ingredients have become a common place even among well-known Muslims in the zeal of imitating the disbelievers. It is these people who have been struggling to bring Muslim women out of Hijab into immodesty and indecency. They have adopted the lifestyles of the disbelievers more than the traditions of the Prophet (saws). Such people are in a dilemma. On the one hand, they desire to freely look at the half-clad bodies of their wives and daughters of other Muslims on the streets; and on the other hand, they do not have the courage to deny the teachings of the Holy Qur'an and the Prophet (saws). Indulging in indecency for so long has killed the sense of modesty (haya) which Islam had commanded them to preserve.
The Prophet (saws) said: "Haya and Trustworthiness will be the first to go from this world; therefore keep asking Allah for them." (Baihaqi)
In conclusion, the Muslim community has implemented the modest attire for a Muslimah but have bypassed the mannerisms to go with it, their speech vulgar and infused with foul words and brimming with sexual innuendo. The social media generation has exploded, obliterating the ounce of decency left in the Muslim society, now shamelessness has reached a all new height, in front of family members, who 'like' such actions, and even the surprised gasp has disappeared.
If the core of the subject is analysed there is a deeper issue of lack of self worth, lack of self respect to throw yourself into the path of a strange man and lure him into sinful activities, to make yourself look and feel better if another is enjoying the carnal nature of your beauty,
So value your decency, your modesty, your manners, it's what beautifies a woman, it's one of the core necessities of a girl to make her a lady. Do not indulge in vain or immoral talk, do not inject foul words to make yourself more acceptable to the modern society, if they do not appreciate your decency, then it is them at fault and you need to find new friends who do appreciate the value of modesty, decency, and good manners. Change your friends, not your good habits, because bad friends, can become bad habits and can lead to destruction of the soul.
Narrated on the authority of Anas bin Malik, the Prophet (saw) said: When lewdness is a part of anything, it becomes defective; and when haya is a part of anything it becomes beautiful. (Tirmidhi)
"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty……." (Qur'an: Surah Nur, 30-31)